Friday, March 23, 2018

Why I feel I'm not attractive

As you guys know, I've had it rough. You guys remember me blogging about this:http://superbowlgreatness.blogspot.com/2018/02/the-name-of-this-blog-says-it-all.html. Don't forget about this onehttp://superbowlgreatness.blogspot.com/2018/02/valentines-day-2018.htmland don't forget about this one http://superbowlgreatness.blogspot.com/2018/03/this-might-be-hardest-post-ive-ever.htmll(If you haven't read all of them, when you get chance, take a look. And also click on the ads. I get .00001 cents when you do, can you say score??!!)

Well, anyway, this is more of a personal one. As you may or may not know, I haven't had many girlfriends. As a matter of fact, I've never had one. I've never been on a date, with the exception of The Junior Prom, but that was as friends, I've never kissed a woman. I haven't even been close. The funny thing, I get along great with women. I can be funny and talk to them but when it comes to romance, they've done wayyy better than me and who can blame them. The thing of all this is that I don't think I've ever had a woman have a crush on me. I'm trying to remember over the years but I don't think so. I wonder if there is something wrong with me. I know I'm not attractive or A Greek God but I thought by now I wouldn't have steady girlfriend but at least date one. Even though, they don't know, I don't plan getting married or having kids. When I think what I've gone through already, I just can't do it anymore. I can't give up anymore of my life.

I just never thought as myself as attractive. I remember a few times growing up in School and someone would say "so and so likes you." I never fell for that for a minute. I knew damn well it was a joke. You look at what I can give a woman and there's really nothing. I'm unemployed at the moment. I have no Driver's License. I have a Mental Illness. I can't do a lot things guys can do. I don't even know how to swim. I just feel like I'm a loser. And I wouldn't want anybody's pity or anything nor would I want to be a 3rd or a 5th wheel.  With everything else going on in my life, this is just one more thing.

Honestly, I wouldn't know where to begin. A Dating Site? I don't know. Are they free? I know this is kind of depressing but I have no confidence in myself. I know that women would rather be with somebody else. I'd be lying if I said I didn't mind my alone time because I think everybody needs some alone time once in a while. It's just I have nothing to offer a woman. I have nothing in common with them. But then you might say "Well, what about on Facebook etc." That's true but I've known you women for years.

It would be nice, though, to kiss someone at Midnight on New Year's Eve or spend Valentine's Day with somebody or kiss somebody under The Mistletoe at Christmas. I just don't know how to go about things. I've always felt I was kind of ugly. You can probably understand that sometimes I need a rocket up my ass to get going. Do you blame me? There are days, weeks when I wake up in the morning and know it won't get better until I go back to bed at night. I just don't know what to do next. It HAS to get better, right? Right?